Uncivil Rights

A BLOG rife with wit, sarcasm, and the endless joy which comes from taunting the socialistic and unpatriotic liberal left. Logical thoughts and musings ONLY need reply...unless you're really, really funny. You have the Uncivil Right to be an IDIOT. "Give me LIBERTY, or give me DEATH!"

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

My apologies

I would like to admit, here and now, that the fiasco in New Orleans is MY fault. All of it. Not just the delayed reaction of the federal government but the whole hurricane. I must get this off my chest...I...still...use...deodorant...spray! Oh GOD, I'm SOOOO SORRY! It was me! I did it! I caused GLOBAL WARMING! Sometimes I sit in my truck and let it idle too! AHHHHHH!!!

Well I feel better. Boy this confession stuff is great! So while I'm at it...

I accepted Bush's tax cut. I caused POVERTY! Sorry.

I drive an Excursion. I NEED OIL TO FILL UP MY GAS GUZZLER! I caused the WAR FOR OIL! Please forgive me.

I...sometimes...listen...to...Air America Radio...HOLY FATHER PLEASE FORGIVE ME! I'M THEIR ONLY LISTENER AND I'VE KEPT THEM ON THE AIR BY LISTENING!

As long as I'm at it, I'd like to apologize for causing the following in some way or another:
labor pains
capitalism
war
obesity
racism
the glass ceiling
slavery
Scooby Snacks
White Castle
wealth
bird flu
anorexia
aids
heterosexuality
hurricanes
tornados
volcanoes
tsunamis
Fords
sporks
commercials
Dr. Phil
leprosy
halitosis
athelete's foot
math
munchkins
Beanie Babies
cell phones
iced coffee
breast implants
reality TV
Christianity
Halliburton

But I will never, NEVER apologize for Jerry Springer...he's just good people...

Please accept all apologies.
totalkaosdave, 8:09 PM
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